Tantric Erotic Massage
By joasses | October 11, 2008
The Yoni Massage (for Women)
My wife and I have practiced Tantra/Sacred Sex for several years and have received much joy from the techniques and processes. One of my wife’s favorite and frequently requested sexual activities is the Yoni Massage. It has greatly expanded our sex life, brought us closer and has given me a greater appreciation of women. We’ve taught the technique to many of our friends and they too have enjoyed good results from it. I offer it here and hope it enhances your sex life. Enjoy.
BACKGROUND INFO
Yoni (pronounced YO-NEE) is a Sanskrit word for the vagina that is loosely translated as “Sacred Space” or “Sacred Temple.” Its meaning and use is an alternate perspective from the Western view of the female genitals (i.e., Pussy, Cunt, Twat, etc., words which may or may not be complimentary depending on the intent of their usage). In Tantra, the Yoni is seen from a perspective of love and respect. This is especially helpful for men to learn.
The purpose of the Yoni Massage is to create a space for the woman (the receiver) to relax, and enter a state of high arousal and experience much pleasure from her Yoni. Her partner (the giver) experiences the joy of being of service and witnessing a special moment. The Yoni Massage can also be used as a form of safer sex (when latex gloves are used) and is an excellent activity to build trust and intimacy. Some massage and sex therapists use it to assist women to break through sexual blocks or trauma.
The goal of the Yoni massage is not orgasm. Orgasm is often a pleasant and welcome side effect. The goal is simply to pleasure and massage the Yoni/vagina. From this perspective both receiver and giver can relax, and not have to worry about achieving something. When orgasm does occur it is usually more expanded, more intense and more satisfying. Orgasm is allowed to happen or not happen.
It is also helpful for the giver to not expect anything in return. Just allow the receiver to enjoy the massage and to relax into herself afterwards. Of course, other sexual activity may follow but it should be entirely the receiver’s choice. This perspective will build greater intimacy and trust, and will greatly expand your sexual horizons.
PREPARATION
Bathing is always helpful as it relaxes both the receiver and giver. A quiet space is desirable with pleasing music, candles, pillows, etc., or whatever makes the participants relax and feel safe. Allow yourself enough time and do not hurry through the process.
Go to the bathroom before beginning the massage. The best results will occur when the bowels and bladder are empty and you will avoid the unnecessary experience of interrupting the massage to go to the bathroom.
Connect with your partner by hugging, holding, eye gazing (looking into each other’s eyes for an extended time), or whatever brings you to a place of safety and relaxation.
PROCEDURE
Have the receiver lie on her back with pillows under her head so she can look down at her genitals and up at her partner (giver). Place a pillow, covered with a towel, under her hips. Her legs are to be spread apart with the knees slightly bent (pillows or cushions under the knees will also help) and her genitals clearly exposed for the massage.
The giver sits cross-legged between the receivers’ legs. The giver may wish to sit on a pillow or cushion. This position allows full access to the Yoni and other parts of the body.
Before contacting the body, begin with deep, relaxed breathing. Both giver and receiver should remember to keep breathing deeply, slowly and with relaxation during the entire process. The giver will gently remind the receiver to start breathing again if the receiver stops or takes shallower breaths. Deep breathing, not hyperventilating, is very important here.
Gently massage the legs, abdomen, thighs, breasts, etc., to get the receiver to relax and for the giver to prepare for touching the Yoni.
Pour a small quantity of a high-quality oil or lubricant on the mound of the Yoni. Pour just enough so that it drips down the outer lips and covers the outside of the Yoni. (Several excellent sexual lubricants are available for this. Many lingerie shops, sex toy shops, sex magazines, etc., offer these safe lubricants.)
CAVEAT - Do not mix oil-based products with latex.
Begin gently massaging the mound and outer lips of the Yoni. Spend some time here and do not rush. Relax and enjoy giving the massage. Gently squeeze the outer lip between the thumb and index finger, and slide up and down the entire length of each lip. Do the same thing to the inner lips of the Yoni/vagina. Take your time.
The receiver can massage her own breasts or may just relax and continue breathing deeply. It is helpful for giver and receiver to look into each other’s eyes as much as possible. The receiver can tell the giver if the pressure, speed, depth, etc., needs to be increased or decreased. Limit your speaking and focus on the pleasurable sensations. (It is my experience that too much talking gets one out of their feelings and diminishes the effects.)
Gently stroke the clitoris with clockwise and counter-clockwise circles. Gently squeeze it between thumb and index fingers. Do this as a massage and not to get the receiver off. The receiver will undoubtedly become very aroused but continue to encourage her to just relax and breathe.
Slowly and with great care, insert the middle finger of your right hand into the Yoni (there is a reason for using the right hand as opposed to the left. It has to do with polarity in Tantra). Very gently explore and massage the inside of the Yoni/ vagina with this finger. Take your time, be gentle, and feel up, down and sideways. Vary the depth, speed and pressure. Remember, this is a massage and you’re nurturing and relaxing the Yoni.
With your palm facing up, and the middle finger inside the Yoni, move the middle finger in a “come here” gesture or crook back towards the palm. You will contact a spongy area of tissue just under the pubic bone, behind the clitoris. This is the G-spot or in Tantra, the sacred spot (there are many excellent books that go into detail about this area). Your partner may feel as if they have to urinate or it may be painful or pleasurable. Again vary the pressure, speed and pattern of movement. You can move side to side, back and forth, or in circles with your middle finger. You can also insert the finger that’s between your middle finger and pinkie. Check with your partner first before sticking two fingers into them. Most women should have no problem and will enjoy the increased stimulation from two fingers. Take your time and be very gentle. You may use the thumb of the right hand to stimulate the clitoris as well.
An option to try if the receiver wants it is to insert the pinkie of the right hand into her anus. Ask her first and do not insert your pinkie into her Yoni/vagina after it has been in her anus. Use lubrication and be very gentle.
(In Tantra, it is said that when your pinkie is in her anus, the next finger and middle finger in her Yoni/vagina, and your thumb on her clitoris, “You are holding one of the mysteries of the universe in your hand.”)
So, what is your left hand doing all this time? You can use it to massage the breasts, abdomen, or clitoris. If you massage the clitoris it’s usually best to use your thumb in an up down motion, with the rest of your hand resting on and massaging the mound. The dual stimulation of right and left hands will provide much pleasure for the receiver. I do not recommend using your left hand to touch your own genitals because it may take your focus off the receiver. Remember, this massage is for her pleasure and much of the benefit comes from not only the physical stimulation but the intent as well.
Continue massaging, trying different speeds, pressures and motions. Keep breathing and looking into each other’s eyes. She may have powerful emotions come up and may cry. Just keep breathing and be gentle. Many women have been sexually abused and need to be healed. A giving, loving and patient partner can be of great value to her.
If she has an orgasm, keep her breathing, and continue massaging if she wants. More orgasms may occur, each gaining in intensity. In Tantra this is called “riding the wave.” Many women can learn how to be multi-orgasmic with the Yoni Massage and a very patient partner.
Keep massaging until she tells you to stop. Very slowly, gently, and with respect, remove your hands. Allow her to just lay there and enjoy the afterglow of the Yoni massage. Cuddling or holding is very soothing as well. As you learn to master the Yoni Massage your sex life will be greatly enriched and you will learn a great deal about feminine sexuality.
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What are the benefits of Tantric sex?
By joasses | October 6, 2008
Tantric sex is not just regular sex. The average “in-out-have a nice day” kind of sex is seen by those who practice Tantric sex as simply wasting energy on something that could be much more than that. Therefore, one could say that Tantric sex means taking sex to a new dimension and using it to improve the link between body and spirit and to extend the rejuvenating power of orgasm to the whole body. After all, why shouldn’t we profit from something that is in our power to do, especially since it does not take much to acquire this skill?
Tantric sex or any other ideas to take your sexual relationship to better dimension, and make the lovemaking process more and more joyful and exiting, is not a developing only process. And that’s the biggest mistake couples make, they want to develop their own unique sex techniques and positions while they could only learn it from sex guides on the internet.
By developing your own techniques your partner may hate it but go a long with it to make you feel better, while watching and learning from sex guides each one of you can make his choices freely.
Maybe there aren’t enough sex guides on the internet but there are two great ones, that could help you and your partner to reach better sexual relationship that you desire.
The tantric sex guide which is new online but have too much to offer, and updated with new material all the time.
And loveCentia which still the best video guide to having sex.
One of the goals of Tantric sex is to stimulate the endocrine glands to produce more hGH, serotonin, DHEA and testosterone. These hormones help improve sexual health, promote the flow of blood through the body, take out the trash (toxins, that is) and strengthen the nervous and immune systems in order to increase the overall health. A person who’s into Tantric sex feels healthy and rejuvenated without the use of substances or devices.
Sex is quite enough to bring about these changes in a person. However, one must know how to engage in sex and what to do in bed in order to achieve this healthy state.Practitioners of Tantric sex claim that it has a rejuvenating effect on men and women, improving sexual health and altering the body’s chemistry by means of brain waves. Frequent and powerful orgasms are a sure way of changing somebody’s mood and of relieving anxiety and depression.
All the maladies plaguing the modern mind (such as stress, depression and lack of confidence) can be cured by having sex more often and by experiencing better and more orgasms. And along with these problems of the mind, one could easily get rid of other problems. Women are interested in Tantric sex because the stressful lifestyles of today take their toll on sexual health. Tired and stressed people are in no mood for sex and, thus, have a bleak view of life and suffer from more conditions than happy people. Although we cannot know for sure, there is a fair chance that many frigid or unhappy women could live far more satisfying lives if their lovers really knew how to take care of them. One of the targets of Tantric sex is to take this unhappiness and turn it into a positive mindset using the body’s own resources.
Men, on the other hand, can have a lot of fun with Tantric sex, especially since it also focuses on improving erection and ejaculation, the two pillars of sex for men. Sexual satisfaction also results in a huge boost to self confidence, which is very likely to trigger a reinforcing psychological pattern of successful performance and increased confidence. A man who can give himself and his partner a couple of strong orgasms on a regular basis is a happy and healthy man. Not to mention that his partner is also bound to enjoy a positive view on life and a general feeling of healthy living.
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Senior Dating
By joasses | September 16, 2008
Mostly we talk about dating of young people but what should do those who are now our seniors and want have fun in the age of 50’s and above. If you’re hesitant about dating again, here are a few tips to help you out.
Learning You have to realize that the world of dating has changed in the last few years. You must have dated when you were in your teens or twenties, you’ll have to learn what courtships in the present day are really like. Give yourself the time to get adjusted to the learning curve dating will present.
Internet dating Internet dating is the one of the best ways to meet singles today of any age group. Learn the basics of setting up a profile, putting appropriate pictures on your site, and emailing people of interest.
Coffee Date The best dating idea for you would be a coffee date so forget a drawn out movie and dinner date. Arrange to meet someone at your local coffee shop for an hour only. If you like him or her you can set up a time for a “real” date after that.
Be Passionate If you want to meet someone with similar interests, there is no better way than by pursuing the things you love. So get out and join in a group or activity that sparks your interest. Check out book groups, art classes, volunteer organizations, or travel groups?
When you enter the dating world again, you might feel as if you’re the only one out there. But remember many seniors have been widowed, divorced, or simply never found the right person and are searching for someone special just like you so go ahead and enjoy life.
Check How To Make A Man Jealous love secrets from Love Guru.
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GOOD SEX IS GOOD FOR YOU!
By joasses | September 9, 2008
by Anthony Fiore, Ph.D.
“Life without love is like a coconut in which the milk is dried up.”
Henry David Thoreau
“Good sex….Improves our health and may even contribute to our longevity.”
Scientific evidence is accumulating support what many of us have suspected all along: good sex not only adds great enjoyment to our lives, but it also actually improves our health and may even contribute to our longevity.
In a new book called Sexual Healing, Dr. Paul Pearsall, Director of Behavioral Medicine at Detroit’s Beaumont Hospital, writes that the joys and pleasures of living life and loving may provide us with something called an “intimacy inoculation” that actually protects us from disease.
Dr. Pearsall, who cites numerous other researchers, concludes, “Growing numbers of physicians now recognize that the health of the human heart depends not only on such factors as genetics, diet, and exercise, but also –to a large extent– on the social and emotional health of the individual.”
Sexual healing is achieved primarily through the daily challenge of maintaining a close, intimate relationship which, when accomplished, leads to balance between our health and healing systems.
Can lack of sexual intimacy create a risk factor for certain diseases? Dr. Pearsall cites research and his own clinical experience ndicating that sexual dissatisfaction seems to be prevalent prior to a heart attack in a high percentage of persons. Conversely, sexual contentment appears related to less severe migraine headaches, fewer and less-severe symptoms of premenstrual syndrome for women, and a reduction in symptoms related to chronic arthritis for both genders.
Although the exact biological mechanisms are not yet identified, many researchers are investigating how our thoughts, feelings, brain, immune system and sexual/genital system interact, influence each other, and affect our health. There may be an actual biological drive toward closeness, intimacy, and being connected to other human beings.
When we experience intimate, mutually caring sexual intimacy, we may experience a measurable change in neurochemicals and hormones that pour through the body and help promote health and healing.
As a result of interviewing many women, Dr. Ogden learned that sexual desire, or lust, was produced by much more than physical stimulation. For women, according to Dr.Ogden, it has more to do with feelings of connectedness in their relationships: “Heart to heart, soul to soul, even mind to mind.”
Obviously, arousal and satisfaction evolve not only from receiving sexual energy, but also from the joy of stimulating one’s partner. Sex, then, is a commitment of give and take.
Finally, the women Dr. Ogden studied have their own concepts of safe sex, essential to experiencing sexual pleasure and ecstasy. This kind of safe sex does NOT relate to preventing STDs or pregnancy; it relates, instead, to emotional and spiritual safety. Such safety is CRUCIAL for sexual closeness. Most of the women insisted that warm, loving connections with themselves and with their partners were essential to and inseparable from the experience of sexual ecstasy.
When people feel deeply close while merely holding hands, they are having sex. When people display caring for each other through hugs, caresses, and kissing, they are also having sex. When connecting people in a crowded room wink at each other in their own secret way, they are communicating sex to each other; such non-contact sex can be excitedly arousing and emotionally fulfilling. And, of course, during sexual union when the sky seems to open so a lightning bolt can strike the couple–while fireworks ignite and the earth stops spinning– this is sex, too.
But wait. Do men also need this almost spiritual connection to enjoy sex and achieve good health? Well, yes and no. Men need sex and men need emotional connection, but many men don’t necessarily need to put the two together!
According to Dr. Bernie Zilbergelt, who wrote The New Male Sexuality, sex for women is intertwined with personal connection. For some men , sex is unto itself–an act to be engaged in with or without love, with or without commitment, with or without connection.
Presently, younger boys are being socialized in a more enlightened manner; consequently, male attitudes toward sexual union are changing. But,unfortunately, the socialization of many men born in or before the 60’s provided very little information of value to the formation and maintenance of intimate relationships. These men were taught, as youths, that males showed love by doing, not by talking or “connecting” with girls.
A consequence of such reticence is (1) lack of intimacy in the relationship, with the wife feeling “left out” of her husband’s life; and (2) men often don’t get what they need because they don’t know how to ask for it, so they feel distanced and frustrated when they really want closeness and intimacy as much as their partner does.
Sex under these conditions creates distance in the relationship or creates sexual dysfunction which drives an even deeper wedge into the relationship. This is especially true if a man is married to a woman must be wanted by her husband to have her sexuality validated.
Consequently, sex routinely becomes mechanical, unfeeling, and unfulfilling. Fortunately, anyone can break this vicious cycle and restore closeness, intimacy, and sexual flow in the relationship.
About the Author:
Anthony Fiore, Ph.D., is in private practice, teaches sex therapy, and owns September Products, a multimedia resource center to enhance relationships and improve sexuality. 1450 N. Tustin Ave., Suite 200, Santa Ana, Ca., 92701.
Voice: 714-771-0378.
Fax: 714-953-9717.
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Better sexual relationship
By joasses | August 18, 2008
Better sexual relationship
What could help you to maintain sexual excitement and intimacy in your relationship, no matter if you are married or just a couple? Sex is very basic and important to make any relationship successful. So to improve your relationship you need and want to improve your sexual activities in your relationship.
Here are 2 facts:
- When making love men are basically having sex, simple straight and fast. Where women are focusing more on the love “word”, emotions makes women reach orgasm.
- Men always had the perfect woman in mind, the face the body, the eye with each and every detail. He can “and will” full in love with deferent woman but that picture will keep being in his mined for ever, not being able to get the perfect woman, that causes an empty space in men sexuality. As a woman do not try to be the woman he dreamed of, but try to fill in the space. Woman’s also has the perfect ideal man, but they can easily replace that picture when they truly full in love. As a man do not try to be the man of her dream but make her love you more and more. That could be hard but possible when you focus on the small details; it is small in your point of view but very hug in hers.
And here are some tips I hope can be helpful:
- talk about sex, no one can tell you what your woman/men loves or hates, what are her/his Sexual Fantasies, what positions can make her/him reach an orgasm. So talk to each other, and try to know every thing about sexuality.
- It is true that men think too much about sex, but this fact could be very positive in your lives if you know how to deal with it. Try to fulfill some of his fantasies.
- Woman is like a flower she will shin in beauty when she gets what she need, and that is love. Send her flowers with out any occasion to her work, write her note, a love letter, surprise her and do what ever it takes to tell her you love her.
- There is nothing wrong in watching an erotic movie together, try also to discus what you watch, to learn more about each other. One thing is wrong in watching erotic movies, it is to make love after 10 minutes of watching, try to watch the movie to its end and build up your excitement.
- There are great sex guides on the internet, in a movie format, book or in membership websites and this last one is the best like
a girl’s guide to 21st century It is great to learn more, explore and take your relationship with your lover to higher level.
Your life is what you make it, the way you think, choices you make and it is short live it full happy but not selfish, try to make all around you especially your partner happy.
I spend an hour a day with my lover on the net together, laughing sometimes but exploring. It is great when you and your partner do something together like browsing the net.
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By joasses | August 17, 2008
Description:
The Tantric Sex Guide is a premium membership program designed for men and women who want to deepen their knowledge, skills and enjoyment of human sensuality. The site offers streaming video, audio, articles, e-courses and e-books to teach advanced sexuality techniques. Using both explicit and non-explicit video, the Tantric Sex Guide details instruction on topics like female orgasm enhancement, ejaculation mastery, intimate communication skills, massage and touch, G-spot orgasm techniques, Kama Sutra positions and much more. Its sophisticated design appeals to the educated consumer, providing an excellent complement to sexual health products by generally stimulating interest in the subject.
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Hello world!
By joasses | August 17, 2008
Welcome to Sensualwriter.com. This is your first post. Edit or delete it, then start blogging!
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